Here it is...
The moment you've all been waiting for!
The wiring diagram to convert '03-'05 headlights to the newer, '06-'08 ones!!
This will make it so that your low beams don't give the high beams a phantom load when they're on and will also make the low beams stay on when you turn on the high beams - just like they're supposed to!
*Use the driver side headlight plug for this and run wires across to the passenger side headlight assembly. Do not connect anything to the passenger side headlight plug coming from the car - tape / seal the plug instead and do not use it.
A huge thanks to Joshua H (thebeephaha) for this!